I am writing this exactly 6 hours before my 25th year on this planet called earth is fulfilled. How can I be so sure? I was born at 4am on August 9th, 1987 in a German town called Offenburg and I am currently in a hotel room in the beautiful town of Saint Tropez in the South of France.
It is August 8th, 2012. 10:11pm. The clock may turn as I continue to write this piece, but my sentiments and thoughts will stay the same.
It is a beautiful, summery evening. The sound of music coming from popular, trendy bars is filling the air and the olympics are airing in the background with a – for me- hardly understandable French commentary.
I have just returned from a nice stroll around the town and a delicious dinner in one of the many trendy restaurants that Saint Tropez has to offer.
It seems to be a night filled with energy, fun and hope. A night full of positivity. A night to remember.
It is a night of ambiguous feelings for me. A night full of amazing, sentimental memories, but also a night that reminds me of lost hopes and dreams.
I am mere hours away from a milestone in my life and I could share a lot about those last 25 years.
I could choose to write about my lost youth due to anorexia and my psychopath brother.
I could choose to write about my failures including no college degree and no thriving career.
I could choose to write about how I believed that baring my soul on one of the biggest blogs in the world would be my breakthrough and how it blew up right in my face.
But I don’t.
Instead, I choose to write about how lucky I was during those 25 years.
Instead, I choose to write about the glorious gifts that I was given.
I want to highlight an early childhood that has been full of fun, freedom and self-expression. I’ve played, danced and roamed around freely in the safety of our village.
I want to highlight all the people that have been there cheering for me, helping me and influencing me.
There’s been my sister, my shining star. There’s been my mom and dad, doing the best they could under the circumstances of life.
There’s been my piano teacher, my mentor and accidental counselor. There’ve been my grandparents, lovingly embracing me whenever I needed them. There’s been my “Mama Reini”, giving me security when I felt like I was in a free fall.
There’s been my husband, loving me unconditionally when I felt like I was dead inside.
More recently, there’ve bee my “imaginary” internet friends. There’s been YOU. And many, many more.
I want to highlight my incredible fortune of being able to travel the world- just like I am doing now. I’ve been to places that many people only dream of all of their lives. Traveling fulfills me, energizes me, keeps me going and never ever leaves me feeling empty. Traveling has been my first love and I’ll never ever go without it.
I want to highlight the wisdom and strength I was able to gather in the last 25 years because of all my struggles. I would not be where I am today without experiencing these hardships and that is OK. No, it’s more than that. It’s the reason I’ve uncovered my self-worth and the knowledge that I am a treasure and an invaluable addition to this world.
I want to highlight my strength in recovering from anorexia and finally feeling at peace with my body. Though my upper arms could be leaner… ;0
I want to highlight finding my life’s purpose and the fulfillment I derive from it is greater than anything I could have ever wished for. I’ve finally put all the pieces together and know that empowering others to reconnect with their self-worth is what I am here for to do.
And last but not least, I want to highlight my excitement about the next 25 years. I am looking forward to every single new day because I know that I will only get stronger, healthier and better at living, breathing and being.
I am going to wake up to a delicious French birthday breakfast in one of my most favorite cities in the entire world – my Saint Tropez -, a place that is filled with many of my fondest memories. And despite the fact that I am in a state of extreme transition, how could I not choose to see how amazing my life has been so far, is and will be?
How about you? Which milestones have you celebrated and how did you choose to look at them?